The telephone rings- I am in the middle of breakfast -my wife picks up the receiver - she talks - then turns to me :
"It is South West Water they say they will only speak to you."
Cross - I hate my breakfast being interrupted - I pick up the receiver
"Hello"
"is that Mr Fulford "
" Yes"
"Could you give the first line of your address."
"Why"
"It's because of the Data Protection Act"
"Well as you are calling my home number you must know the first line of my address"
"We have to ask for it -it is the Data Protection Act"
"I am sorry I cannot speak to morons at this time of the morning" and put the telephone down.
That is absolutely brilliant.
ReplyDeleteWell done - thank you!
ReplyDeleteThe Sister Moron Company: South EAST Water
ReplyDelete“Hello, is that Mr Moore?”
“Who is this?”
“This is South East Water. Am I speaking to Mr Moore?”
“Yes, what’s this about?”
“Before I can speak about your account I have to take you through security.”
“I don’t want to go through security thank you.”
“Because of the Data protection act I have to ask you for the first line of your address.”
“It’s because of the Data Protection Act that I cannot disclose that information. I don’t know who YOU are.”
“I said we are South East Water.”
“But you can’t prove that can you?”
“I can give you our number for you to call and verify.”
“Why would I call you? I don’t want to speak to YOU; you want to speak to ME!”
“But I can’t speak to you unless you tell me the first line of your address. It’s the Data Protection Act.”
“I can’t tell you that, it’s the Data Protection Act. It’s a conundrum isn’t it?”
“I can’t continue any further with this conversation.”
“Why are you calling me at 8:30 in the morning?”
“We start work at 8am”
“Really? Well, that’s your f*cking problem not mine!”
Hang up